Now don't get me wrong, I don't hate this time of year but appraisals aren't particularly pleasant, are they? Now you'll be pleased to learn that my former line manager left the organisation when they had their last clear out (or redundancy package as it's better known) so for the last six months I've worked for Stanley. I wouldn't describe Stanley as odd exactly, but he's 52 and still lives with his parents. He does have a lovely line in V neck jumpers and slacks which are always an inch too short in the leg and very high waisted. Stanley's strange habits include whilstling the death march under his breath, eating all of the cheese during office buffets and setting key articles in The Economist to recorder music at lunchtime.
He said that I was doing very well (not in a Young Mr Grace way of course)and that I had great potential if only I'd 'seize the moment'. Maybe I'd be more willing to 'seize' something or other if my job was safe or there was a pay rise in the offing, but as there clearly isn't any light at the end of this metaphorical tunnel I think I'll stay put. Hrrrpppphhhh!
When I returned home tonight there was a strange package waiting for me in the hallway. When opened it consisted of an authentic fox fur wrap, a Twenties style 'flapper' dress, a pair of Mary Jane style shoes, silk stockings, a brown bobbed wig and a feather fascinator. There was also a large box of Fortnum and Mason chocolates and a mongrammed business card from 'he who shan't be named'. Perhaps things are looking up for me?
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